Dear Starbucks,

I do not like you anymore - in fact, I cannot believe I ever liked you or even pretended to be mildly content with you and your ridiculously bad coffee and espresso.

I hate your stupidly long lines. I hate the way you yell at me and make me order strange things when I'm barely awake and can hardly *say* my own name, much less _spell_ it. Jeez. Plus, I hate feeling like I'm in line for a cattle call. Knock that shit off.

In addition, your weak, unpalatable coffee does nothing to wake me up or release the dopamines I so desperately need in the morning.

Finally, I don't feel good about the experience I have in your facility. I'd much rather visit the German woman who runs the quaint small coffee stand in the back alley, only accepts cash, and understands that I'm a spiller so she gives me a giant cup for my tiny latte with brown sugar. (Yes, Starbucks, she *has* brown sugar, and, she puts it in there for me!)

I wanted to visit her today, in fact, but I got dropped off too far north to justify turning around and walking back when I was already late. And I haven't found any coffee places as good as hers so sadly, as a creature of habit, I went back to you.

We won't be having a relationship anymore though, Starbucks, because I'm over you. I'm really over you. And unless you are the only thing around, I won't set foot in your establishment that reeks of mediocrity.

Lower your prices - make your coffee taste good - give me personal service.

I'm out.