My Toaster Oven

Is a lethal combination of brushed-nickel and evil.
It gets immense pleasure from burning my flesh
when I reach inside to remove my english muffin
because I am greedy and hungry.

My Toaster Oven -
I call it "The Punisher"
because it punishes hungry women who have worked out too hard
and are impatient for dinner.

My thumb has been burned twice in a week from that farking thing.

Perhaps next time I will wait until it is *done* toasting?

No, probably not.