My response

Well, Brody's already sent Sandra an email pretty much laying in to her.  We are all sending emails to everyone involved to prove to my sister that nobody is lying.   WTF??!!

Here's what I had to say:

While we are on a roll here, I have some things I would like to say.

First, I don't think it's fair to bring ANYONE into individual relationships that we have with each other because we all act differently one on one than we do in a group.  Our relationships with each other are private and personal, and having everyone clear the air this way debases every one of those personal relationships.

For my part, I feel more stupid and sorry about the way I handled things than I can ever relate to anyone.  I think about it every day.  Sandra, just because I am not calling you to apologize every day, or being pissed at anyone every day, does NOT mean I don't feel sorry or sad.
 
I think the situation was handled horribly.  I think I was a large part of that problem because I didn't know who to trust about what was really going on.  I feel satisfied now about the result, but not about the way it happened.  I won't involve myself there again.

I can only speak for myself when I say that I was interested in finding out more information about the situation prior to involving CPS in any way. 

Also, I do think that mom is overprotective to the point of letting her passion blind her to reality when she feels a loved one is in danger.  This does not mean that I don't love her, or that I value her any less.  I'm certainly guilty of letting mom's perception of a situation taint my own view, and I've vowed not to listen to anything anyone says about other people or their relationships.  I'm tired of the assumptions and I'm tired of the gossip and the meddlesome nature of this family.

As far as Evan and mom are concerned, he does not *pretend* to like her.  He likes her a lot and he thinks she's a wonderful person.  Sometimes she's misguided, and yes, she's prone to exaggeration, however I don't think these are family secrets.   

I have told all of you that I thought the entire situation got blown way out of proportion and that I felt stupid dealing with it at all.  Immediately after talking with Sandra I told Brody exactly what my thoughts on this were.  I admit I didn't tell mom or dad for a few days after that, but I really didn't want to talk to anyone about it for a couple of days.  Since that time I have told everyone the same thing.  Sandra, I don't know why you think I am lying on this ... but that's your decision. 

For Sandra:

I have inquired about Zoe and I'm sorry that Ashley hasn't spent more over-nighters at my house, but you can't criticize that while at the same time telling me I'm not allowed to see her again.  It just doesn't add up. 

I'm really sorry for hurting Michael, but I can't fix that until he is willing to spend time in the same physical space.  I've apologized to him.  I've taken responsibility for my actions and I've changed the way I view any relationship between two people. 

I'm sorry you said the things you did today, and I'm sorry that Evan and I are once again upset about this issue.

If you don't want contact with us, that's your decision.  In an effort to respect your decision and give you some much needed space, I won't be contacting you until I hear something contrary to your last letter.

If you decide not to be in my wedding party, or be the photographer, please let me know by September so that I can find a replacement.  There obviously won't be anyone who could replace my sister standing up there with me, but I can find another photographer without much difficulty.

For everyone:

I'm sorry for all the trouble this has caused, but I refuse to accept full responsibility because EVERYONE in this family has bitched about everyone else.  And EVERYONE in this family has made assumptions about each other or our relationships that were invalid and untrue.  EVERYONE HERE IS AT FAULT for something or another, including you, Sandra.

I also refuse to mediate things anymore.  It's too much for me to handle and I'm not a mind reader so sometimes I make mistakes.

Let's stop rumors, gossip and assumption, and start honestly talking without yelling and closing each other off.  I'm done with that part of my life, thanks.

Hope you all are having as good a day as I am.

Jocelyn